Susandoodles

During the past few months, I have had the honor of officiating at two funerals, and yesterday I attended a third funeral.  There is one resounding principle that keeps ringing in my ears:  the greatest gift ever is love.

Yesterday’s funeral was for a member of my church family of 28 years.  I came to this community to join a team establishing an alternative education program for the county.  As a Methodist, I entered a new church building and was welcomed into the church family.

My new job’s director was also a part of this church, and her family became part of my world.  My working peers became part of my family.  My biological family existed hours away, even states away, but that did not diminish the value of my family, maybe even added to the value I placed on them.

Is there a link to all these families?  Yes.  Love.

God is also the critical foundation for my family and all its many faces.  Raised in a rural community, we lived knowing and trusting God.  We structured our lives around Sunday morning worship, Wednesday night choir practice and, as I got older, Sunday night youth group.

I have never doubted that God is love.  I have never struggled with whether or not there is God.  I simply believed and was raised to love one another.

Even though I am temporarily unable to attend regular worship, I joined my church family as we said farewell to one, the one who I counted as a model Christian, who loved one another unconditionally.

This circles back to seeing love as two gifts.  God is love.  He gives us love.  He teaches us how to love.  He sends us out to love others.  Love grows exponentially through this gift.

But there is the second side of love—receiving love.  We love God by accepting his gift of love.  We accept that gift and then use that gift.  Love received is love to give.  Again, love grows exponentially.

Each time we use love, we give love as well as receive love.  Each person we meet and accept them for themselves, we are loving unconditionally.  Each time we receive love from someone else, we give love to them, too.

During yesterday’s funeral, love filled the sanctuary.  Love from the church family wrapped around the family.  And then we sat and received love not only from the family and friends, but from the deceased himself.  He loved us so much that he chose to send a message to us through a video clip and the hymn he chose.

I found myself reflecting on the past few months and the recent funerals I have been honored to officiate.  Love comes in so many ways and sometimes we fail to recognize it.

The phrase that the greatest gift of all is love may have been engrained into my Christian training, but then I realized, love grows not only when giving to others, but it grows when we accept love given to us.  Again, love grows exponentially.

Turning to scripture, many are familiar with the gospel John 3:16:

¹⁶ For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

But as I was developing my thoughts about love has two forms, giving and receiving, I read a different verse from 1 John 4:16:

¹⁶ And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.

God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.

Attending a funeral is a form of giving love, but I now see it as a time to receive love.  Yesterday we saw love in action as the family and friends gave love to each other, but we also received love from the witness of his life and the testimony of his family, especially of his sons.

My generation often discusses how we never heard our parents tell us those three words we long to hear, “I love you.”  And sadly, many of us do not tell our own children, “I love you.”  We simply do not say the words.

Instead, we act.  We use love in a range of actions whether it is preparing a meal, disciplining a wayward behavior, making sure there is food, shelter and clothing to meet basic human needs.  The business of giving love got in the way of communicating love in words.

Today’s generations are the product of love, generations of love given.  The awareness that the gift of love grows when received is proven as we watch the current generations finding ways to say they love the next generation.

My retirement generation can see the younger generations striving to give love verbally even more than we did.  We can see the generations using love much like we did, too.  

These youngest generations are doing all they can to provide food, shelter, and clothing inevitably assuring the next generation become all they can.

My prayer is that we learn to recognize love in all its forms.  Then we must learn to receive love unconditionally as well as to give love unconditionally.   This is how God as love grows exponentially.

To my family, to my friends, to my church family, to my world:  I love you.  Thank you for your love which grows exponentially.